The List: Six

To catch up:

THE LIST: CHAPTER INDEX

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5

Chapter Six:  The Sleepover

Nora seemed a bit taken aback when I brought Ame home earlier.  I was not expecting that from her.  Of course, she didn't show these emotions on the surface; I just felt that emitting from her.  I can be a sentient person sometimes.

Nora tells me all the time I should always embrace my sentient side.  So many have innate abilities, and tend to ignore them when they conform to society's standards--or so that's what she's always told me before.  I think the reason Nora was shocked to see Ame at all was because we--Ame and I--haven't been exactly on speaking terms for a few months.  I figure I can explain my day to Nora sometime tomorrow when we're alone or something.

I don't want to make my cousin feel bad.  She does mean well in her own way.  I just wanted to stop seeing things her way, and do things my way for once.  Sometimes, in order for people to change and grow, they need to separate themselves from others until they find out just what they want out of life; that was what I had done.

I know Ame feels hurt by what I've done, but I also know how forgiving she can be.  I know eventually, she'll come around and--hopefully--understand where I'm coming from.  I bring my thoughts back to the present, and spit out the toothpaste that washed my mouth.  I rinse the toothbrush off and hang it up.

I told Ame I needed a moment after we watched Cast Away for the millionth time.  I don't know why we're watching this movie.  I'd rather be watching some kind of a rom-com right about now.  I've been in a fragile state of mind lately, but I don't want to ruin the fun Ame and I are having.

We've watched Cast Away so much, we start creating our own dialog on what the characters are saying.  It was pretty funny, but I just needed a moment to myself, and so I excused myself to get ready for bed.  There still is school in the morning, so we can't stay up too much longer.

I walk out of the bathroom, and hear my cousin saying something.

"And even in death
"I will stay on the right path
"The best I could be"

I recognize what she's saying.  That's a haiku I wrote in my journal.  I open the door to find her with my journal in her hands.  She looks up at me, pretends nothing is wrong about this situation at all, and smiles.

"I didn't know you kept a secret diary," she says.

I don't know what to say to her.  The last time, she found out I was making a list of things I'd like to accomplish in my life--which, when she found out, she freaked out--and that was one of the reasons why we hadn't talked in a long time.

"Uh, sorry," she continues to speak.  "I stumbled upon it under the pillow.  Something felt uncomfortable when I laid my head down."

I still say nothing.  I am surprised she hasn't tried to argue with me like the last time.  I look down to the ground.  I just want to enjoy my senior year; I don't want any trouble.

"Again, I'm sorry," I look back at her.  "I shouldn't have read your secret diary without your permission.  Though I must tell you," she pauses, closes the book, and hands it to me.  "You're a fantastic writer.  I didn't know you could write haiku's and poetry like that."

I give a curt laugh.  "Neither did I," I find myself say.  I look back at her.  "For the record it's a journal, and if it was so secretive, I would have found a better hiding place for it.  I keep it under the pillow to write down my weird dreams."

"Oh," she responds as if a light bulb just went on in her head or something.  "That explains those cryptic entries."

"Yeah," I give a little smile as I head over to my bed to put my journal back under the pillow.

"Why do you write down your dreams?"

"My shrink told me to," I begin.  "She told me to write them down, because it's a way of the subconscious telling you something."

"Is that why you made that list?"

"No," I yawn as I crawl into bed.  "You know why."  I lay down and turn off the lamp light.

I hear her sigh as she crawls into the other side of my king-sized bed.  "I know."

She starts mumbling something, but I'm not really listening as my dreams have now taken full effect.  I'm sure whatever it is, we can chat more in the morning after my jog.

*******

The List: Five

To catch up:

THE LIST: CHAPTER INDEX

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4

The List:  Chapter 5

I look up at the ceiling of the gym room, and see the spider web that has grabbed my attention.  I wonder how long the spider has to wait until food becomes entrapped by the web.  I can't believe I survived a whole day of school--well, almost.

I met Cristi at lunch, just as she said she would meet me, but something was different about her when I saw her in the cafeteria.  She looked hungry, even though she was barely picking at her meal during lunchtime.  When the bell rang, I could tell she looked a bit happy.  It was almost as if it was her first time in the cafeteria from my own observation.  But still, when the bell rang, she looked happy and asked once again if she could join me for tryouts.

And again, I told her she could, but tryouts started five minutes ago.  I'm guessing whatever was ailing Cristi, is probably ailing her now.  Sometimes a viral bug takes days to go away--I mean--if she has a viral bug.

"Okay," I turn my head to look at the girl speaking.  I suddenly remember I'm at the gym, trying out for the impossible, but it is on my list.  "Next up, Kallie."

I take a deep breath and try to remember the routine I've been working on all summer.  It was a very long summer.  I wonder how the spider does it while resting comfortably in their web.  They don't think; they simply act on instinct.  I am ready to do this.

I step out away from the crowd of girls, and stand in front of the three cheerleaders that are conducting the tryouts.

"Hey everyone," Ame, the head cheerleader speaks.  "Can we take five?"  She looks at me and pulls me to the side.

"Kalura," she says to me.  "What are you doing here?"

"Well, Amethyst," I answer.  "I wanted to try out for cheerleading."

"Are you sure this is wise?"

"I think I know what I'm doing."

"Had I known Kallie was short for Kalura, I would have stopped you."

"Please don't do this, Ame," I beg.

Amethyst happens to be my cousin.  Everyone around here calls her Ame for short.  With a name like hers and a name like mine, it's not hard to tell we're related, but that's about it.

Amethyst got her name because when she was born, her eyes were of an amethyst color.  Usually babies have blue eyes that eventually turn color, but not Ame.  Her eyes have been this blue amethyst color since birth.

Her hair is pin straight, and hangs down to her waistline, and the color of her hair is such a dark brown, it's almost black.  If it weren't for her eye color, you could swear she was of Korean descent.  I would love to have her eyes.  My eyes are a very light blue, almost translucent if it weren't for the dark blue rings that outlines the irises of my eyes.  I look at my cousin, still pleading.

"Why do you want to do this?"  She asks me.

"Because," I begin to say.  I decide to not say anymore.

"Not because of that stupid list," she exclaims.  "Tell me it's not because of that list!"

Amethyst, though we are the same age, feels she needs to be protective of me.  We have kind of grown up together like sisters, but things changed between us when I started being homeschooled.  It was like we both wanted different things out of life; I wanted to live my life, while she wanted to shelter me from it.

We stopped hanging out in public, and she would only show up to my house alone.  I stopped hanging around her friends as well.  It's been so long, I don't think any of them would recognize me anyway.  What ever they knew of me then, they don't know me now.  I don't even believe anyone knows we're related, even if we do share the same last name.  Her father is my dad's older brother.  Perhaps that's why she feels protective over me.  I'll never truly know the answer to that, I suppose.

"And what if it is because of the list?" I find myself rhetorically asking.  "It's not like I'll cause any kind of damage to you.  I can always be a fill in just in case someone can't make it to a meet."

I can tell by her face that she wants to tell me no.  I'll have to soften it up a bit.

"Please, Ame.  Please," I beg.  "Can't you just humor me for once and let me fulfill what's on my list."

I can tell she's contemplating.  She suddenly has a playful look in her face.  "Can I see your list?"

"Only if you promise not to judge," I begin.  "Perhaps I can show you after school.  You can come home with me."

She smiles.  "Alright," she finally agrees.  "I'll let my parents know and," she takes a pause and inhales.  "Oh, maybe we can have a sleepover."

"I'm sure Nora won't mind," I say.

"Oh is Uncle Kaleb and Aunt Laura not home?"

"Nope.  It's just Nora and I."  And Smith, the bodyguard my parents hired because they feel bad for not being around for almost a year now.  I keep the last statements to myself.

"So, have you met anyone today?"

"A nice girl," I reply.  "She was supposed to meet me for tryouts, but she was looking sick earlier in the cafeteria.  Her name is Cristi."

"Cristi Turner?"  She asks.  "Her twin brother is Xander Turner.  He's the goaltender of the hockey team here."

It seems as though this Xander guy is everywhere.  Maybe I shouldn't bother with tryouts.

"Well, let's see what you got," Ame says to me.  I guess I have to go through with it as I have just practically begged her to let me try out.  "Hey guys," she calls out to her teammates.  "Break time is over!  Let's see what Kallie can do."

I can hear them cheering in back of me.  I feel a little nervous, but I inhale, and give Ame the song on my MP3 player I want to play.  She plays the track, and I'm ready to do my cheer.

The song ends as my routine is done.  Ame pauses the MP3 player, and everyone is silent.  Well, I think to myself.  At least I tried my best.

"Oh my gosh!"  One of the girls in back of me says as she walks up to me.  "You're like a natural!  Where have you been hiding?"  I look around an all the girls agree.

"She's been gone for awhile," Ame says before I can say anything about homeschooling.  "I didn't want to say anything because I wanted her to get on the team by her own merit.  You guys!  This is my cousin, Kalura!"

They were all excited and asking me all kinds of questions.  I didn't even know where to begin on answering.  Everything started to feel jumbled.

"Congratulations," Ame speaks over everyone.  They all silence down to listen to what she has to say.  "Kallie," she looks at me.  "Welcome to the team!"

We practice some routines for about an hour, and then we all head home.

Amethyst goes to get in the car, but panics a bit when she sees Smith, my bodyguard.

"Oh no!" I roll my eyes and walk over to him.  "I thought we agreed you were to hide in plain site."

"I'm sorry Miss Kalura," Smith begins.  "But I have orders."

"Well, this is my cousin, Ame, and she's coming home with me."  Smith opens the door and I enter the car.  "Come on, Ame.  I'll explain to you everything."

On the ride home, Amethyst listens to every word I say.  She listens to me tell her how my parents have been gone--like always--still trying to save the world of cancer, and how I inherited a bodyguard.

A night with my cousin and Nora should be interesting.



DJ

NEXT:

Chapter 6
******

The List: Four

To catch up:

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3


It always goes back to the list
The one that gets lost in the mist
And watch the colored dragonfly
Becomes the innocent passer by

The topics embedded in mind
Leaves you to fall down behind
It's best to just find the real you
The broken pieces filled with glue



FOUR

"What?"  Cristi begins.  "Don't tell me you've never had a guy into you before."

"I've been homeschooled," I answer honestly with her.  "I wouldn't even know how to tell if a guy is into me.  Besides, I have other plans, and a guy is just not on my list."

"You have a list?"  She asks.  "Like a bucket list."  There's that word again.  "I thought only old people did those things."

"And very young people who have trouble focusing, and need a list to create in order to fulfill their dreams," I interject.

"Hmm, yeah.  I guess I never thought of it that way.  How long have you been making a list?"

"Since I've been homeschooled," I answer.  I really don't know how else to answer that.  I just woke up one day, and decided that a list needed to be made.

"So, then, tell me," she pauses.  "What's first on your list?"

I go to speak when she interrupts.  "Oh, my God!  That is so rude of me!  I don't know why I even asked that.  It's none of my business at all."

"It's okay.  It's not that big of a deal.  The first thing on my list is to live my life like any normal teenager would.  I want to experience the high school life.  That means dances and after school programs.  Today I'm planning on trying out for the cheerleading team."

"Oh my! That sounds so cool!  I've never thought about doing something like that before.  Do you mind if I try out with you?"

I shrug.  "Sure."  I look at my schedule.  "I have Chemistry in room two twenty-four, do you know where that is?"

"Yes," she seems sad.  "It's just three doors down, to the right.  I have to make up some algebra classes, and I believe this is where we part ways.  What period do you have lunch?"

I look at my schedule.  "Um, I am free fifth period."

"Okay then I'll see you in the cafeteria."

"Sounds good," I say.

We part ways, and just before I reach the door to the classroom, I hear someone mention the word aphrodisiac.  That's a rather strange word for someone to say.  I don't want to look to see who's talking, but I can't help myself.  I can feel someone staring at me again.  Please don't let it be Xander.

I look up, and it is him.  I wonder how much he heard me say to his sister.  Our eyes lock for a brief moment.  But in that brief moment, it feels like an eternity.  I am staring right into his blue-green eyes.  I couldn't tell this morning if they were blue or green due to it being dark out still, but they really are a blue-green color; much like the ocean.

I break our stare and I head into the classroom.  I show my schedule to the teacher.  She looks at it and smiles at me.  "Welcome to the class, Kalura.  Is there a nickname you go by?"

I guess Kalura is just so strange, people feel funny saying it.  I can't tell you how many times I've had to explain my name to people.  Who knew a name with six-letters, and three syllables, would be so confusing?

I smile back at her.  "Some call me Kallie with a K," I reply.

"Welcome to our school, Kallie.  Have a seat, and we'll begin when the bell rings."

I take my seat just as the second bell rings.  I didn't want to sit in anyone's seat, and so I waited for everyone to sit down.  I notice there's room up front, by the door.  I choose to sit there.

The teacher turns on the movie screen, and looks over at me.  "Kallie?  Would you mind turning off the lights?"

I smile and turn off the lights that's right above my head.

"Thank you."

I had no idea the first day of school is filled with random poetry, and watching films.  I was confused as to how a student already had a poem submitted for school, but then Cristi passed me a note telling me how Tawny is fifteen, and is expected to graduate from high school this year.  Apparently she spends her summers in school to earn credit.  Mr. Club liked her poetry so much, he decided to read it on the first day of school.

"How does chemistry work in your every day life?"

The voice on the screen interrupts my thoughts, and I find myself watching the documentary.  Since I have focus issues, I figure it'll be best to take out my notebook and write down some notes.  That is how I learn the best.

The documentary is comparing chemistry to people.  In some cases, while people are opposite, they tend to attract each other--and in other cases, they tend to be the polar opposites, much like magnets, or chemicals you combine.  The right chemicals will create something beautiful, and the wrong ones could possibly burst.

I don't really know that much about life, or people.  To me, this is all just the beginning.

***

DJ

The List: Three

For those interested in the previous chapters, click on the link below:

THE LIST: CHAPTER INDEX

Chapter 1
Chapter 2

Running to feel fine
Time that's racing blows my mind
A race for it all


THREE

"Oh, child," Nora says to me when I arrive back inside from my jog.  "Y'all had me worried about you."

"I'm sorry, Nora," I say.  "My hat flew off, and some boy caught my hat and started talking to me."

"Oh, a boy!  Girl, you should add that to your list."

I just love her thick, New Orleans accent.  I wish I had an accent like that, but I don't.  It's just a regular kind of speak.  There are some parts of Florida that don't have an actual accent due to people who move down here from all parts of the world and such.

I turn and walk backwards so I can see Nora's face better.  I know she wants me to be happy, but I have better plans.

"You know having a boyfriend is not on my list, nor will it ever be," I reply.  I turn back around and walk in my room where my school clothes are laid out.  Nora has a white button-down shirt and a pleated dark blue skirt waiting for me on the bed.

"You do know this is not a traditional private school I'm going to, right?"  I call out to her.

At the prestigious Calusa Fields High School, the dressing option is pretty much open.  You just have to dress in a more professional manner.  Though you are allowed to wear jeans on Fridays, it's not a very strict dress code like if you were going to a Catholic school or something.  You just can't wear any flip-flops or tank tops--clothing like that are not presentable anyway, in my opinion.

"Of course I know that, child," Nora responds as she enters the room.  She walks over to the bed, and picks up the shirt, and walks it over to me.  "These colors just go with your skin tone so well.  I just want you to make a great first impression."

I give her a warm smile.  "Thank you."  I don't argue with Nora.  I trust her judgement.  She brushes my hair with her hand, and walks out of the room so I can get dressed.

I put on the clothes, but start feeling awkward at my bare legs.  I head for my dresser to find a pair of leggings to put on underneath my skirt.  I put on a blue pair of leggings to go with my skirt.  I want to make it look like it's a part of my outfit.  I then put on white ankle-length socks, and my dark blue Converse sneakers.  I am pretty sure I am casual dressed, but I don't care.  At least I'm presentable.

A few months back, when I went to enroll for my senior year, I saw how the girls dressed.  They wear high heels and matching purses.  I've always been kind of girly, but never that kind of girl.  Even though I took ballet, I still love to watch a good hockey game on TV.  I take a deep breath, and I head out of the room.

"You look so beautiful," Nora says to me.  "But why hide your nice legs? You should really add meeting a boy to your list."

Nora wants so much for me to live the normal teenage life.  There is no such thing as normal anyway.  I do know, however, I don't want to add boyfriend to my list.

I started making a list for myself when I was about twelve years old.  Most would call it a bucket list, but I don't like that term.  A bucket list makes things in life seem so FINAL.  I'd rather call it a living list as opposed to a bucket list.  I get there was a movie called the Bucket List, but it seems it's become a rather cliche term these days.

One thing on my living list is to enroll in school.  I have that checked off.  The next one is cheerleading tryouts, which will be today after school.  I don't have time for a boyfriend, which is what I finally say to Nora.

"If you say so, child," she says with a smile.

I know that look.  She has a gift for knowing things.  Sometimes I grow a little curious as to what she knows, but I also know there is a certain balance in this world and perhaps, I'm not meant to learn what it is until later on.

I give her a hug, tell her I love her, and head out the door to my first day of school.  I walk out the door where there is a car and driver waiting for me.  This is not an unusual thing for someone like me to see.

I am just grateful that one of the perks of being in a prestigious private high school, means lots of students will have their own personal drivers.  I'm not so sure about bodyguards.  I just hope Smith is better at blending in at school than he was earlier on my jog.

I sigh as I get in the back of the car.  Smith--my bodyguard--shuts my door as I get inside.  I watch as he opens the front passenger door, gets in, and puts on his seat belt.

I pretty much say nothing, but I beg of Smith to not stay so close as I would like to make at least one friend this school year.  He nods his head, though I can't tell if he will listen to my wishes as he has not done so already.

I get into the school, and I immediately feel eyes focused on me.  Of course they would be focused on me, I am the new girl after all.

"Hey, check out the new chick," I hear a guy say, but I don't even bother to look up, and I decide to keep on walking down the hallway.  I have to head to the office to officially sign in, and get my class schedule.  But I don't even get that far.  Not even two seconds that guy mentioned something about the new chick, I feel an arm cross with my arm.

I look with wide eyes to see a girl walking with me.  "Don't mind my brother and his friends," she says to me.  I wasn't planning on it, but I say nothing of it.  "They're always interested in new people.  Well, not my brother so much, but his friends are."

"Oh," is the only thing I can manage to say.  I've not had anyone my own age to really talk to in a while with the exception of my cousin.  Everyone else I basically talk with are adults.  I guess I can be a bit timid when it comes to having conversations with others.

"You're the quiet type until they get to know you, aren't you?"  The girl asks me.  It's almost as if she can read my mind or something.

I shrug.  "I guess," I say to her.

"Oh," she exclaims.  "I can see we are going to be the best of friends.  My name is Cristi.  There's no H in my name, and it ends in an I rather than a Y.  My real name is Alexis Cristine, but everyone calls me Cristi.  I think it was because that was the first name I could say properly when I was little.  Oh, but enough about me.  What's your name?"

"Kalura," I reply.  "It's a combination of Kaleb with a K, and Laura, which are the names of my parents."

"Oh, what a wonderful name," she replies.  "I can call you Kallie for short."

I have been given a nickname.  Now I can scratch that off the list.

"So," Cristi begins.  "What's your first class?"

"Um, I don't know yet," I answer candidly.  "I have to go to the office to pick up a schedule."

"Well, let me help you, if you don't mind."

I look at her gratefully.  "I would love some help," I say.  "Thank you."

We head to the office, where Cristi seems to know everyone there.  It's like she's a very friendly and popular person.  I wish I had long, wavy blonde hair like she does.  It almost seems to bounce with every turn she makes.  My hair is short, straight, and not so blonde like hers.  My hair color is considered a dirty blonde, perhaps more of a light brown kind of a color.  Right now, my hair is all one length, and it lays about down to my shoulders.

"You ready for your first class?"  She asks, breaking me out of my reverie.  I look up at her sparkling emerald eyes.

I take a deep breath.  "I guess I'm as ready as I'll ever be."

"Great," she smiles.  "What's your first class?"

"Um," I begin as I look down at my schedule.  "Poetry with Club."

"Oh, Mr. Club is an awesome teacher!  And it just so happens we have the same class together!  I'll walk with you."

"Alright," I say.  "Thanks."

"Maybe we can compare notes on our schedules.  I can show you what classes you need to go to after."

"I-I don't want to put you out," I stammer a bit.  "Are you sure?"

"Really," she replies.  "It's not a problem."

I express my gratitude again as we enter the classroom.  I hand Mr. Club my schedule.  He takes a look at it, and looks back at me.

"Kallie is new here," Cristi says from behind me.  "I'll be showing her around today."

Mr. Club hands me back my schedule and clears his throat.  "Please, Ms. Wise," he calls me by my last name.  "Have a seat, and welcome to poetry class."

Cristi automatically picks out a seat for me, and she sits at the desk next to me.

"Now," Mr. Club clears his throat.  He starts to recite a poem:


"He is much like a flower
"Given to rise with power
"But with war he'll cower
"Forever is the final fate
"The life of a fragile flower
"Stems from a mind of state

"Crumble and land on down
"To be stepped on in ground
"Nothing is left to be found
"But the memories from his wife
"By then she's homeward bound
"The fragility meaning of life

"And how the fires flame
"No proper place to tame
"This way we play a game
"As if this were something fun
"Insensitive to the insane
"We would prefer to run

"We fail to find the kind
"Push the button on rewind
"But our eyes we turn blind
"So upon perish we cry
"Regrets too late to fine
"Spreading wings to fly

"Regrets what should've said
"Swirling around in the head
"Lack of sleep in the bed
"Regret lies thick and strong
"Yet we still deny the dread
"Of not saying what we long

"Oh, fragile flower you'll lay
"Upon the burning lighted day
"And falling in a delicate way
"Withered into a blackish rust
"Yet no one seems to say
"Rebirth derives from the dust

"Who is truly to tell the tale
"When we turn shallow and pale
"On board the ship we set for sail
"And travel our lone merry ways
"Hearing the love's cries wail
"And remain the rest of our days"



Mr. Club pauses for dramatic effect.  This much I can tell.  He inhales and says, "Can anyone tell me what Tawny," he is pointing to a kid sitting in the front row.   "Is referring to in her poem 'The Flower'?"

He looks around, and calls upon someone raising their hand.  "Yes," he asks.

"That she's comparing flowers to humanity," the voice says.

I know I've heard that voice before, and not too long ago.  I turn and look to see it's that boy I met at the park this morning during my jog; I believe he said his name was Xander.  I start thinking about things; like how much of a coincidence it is I happen to see Xander in the same classroom as me.  Or better yet, how smart he seems to be.  He knows his poetry well, or so it seems.

"That is correct, Mr. Turner," Mr. Club says.

I quickly look at my notebook and I start to draw some doodles on the page. I brought my notebook thinking I would be taking notes or something.  Maybe in my next class.  I can't help but feel someone staring at me.  I have one of those instincts where I know if someone is staring at me or not.  I get a chilly feeling on my neck.  I look around to notice only one pair of eyes watching me.

I turn to look right at Xander staring at me.  Normally when you look at someone, they tend to look away.  This is not the situation though.  I make myself look away and go back to my scribbling.  Just as I'm trying to think of something to really draw, there are another pair of eyes on me.

I look next to me and notice it's Cristi this time staring at me.  The bell rings, and I put my notebook away in my backpack.

"Before you go," Mr. Club says.  "I want you all to turn in a piece of poetry describing your first day of your senior year.  I look forward to seeing them tomorrow."

I silently sigh on the inside.  I'm not very good at poetry.  I'm definitely not as creative as Tawny was in class with her poem.  I head out of the classroom.

"Hey wait up!"

I turn to see Cristi trying to catch up with me.  I patiently wait for her.  She starts walking close to me.  She's close enough to speak to me in a secretive manner.  I noticed my brother was staring at you!  He doesn't usually stare at girls.  I thought for sure he was into boys, but the way he was staring at you--"

"Wait," I interrupt.  "Xander is your brother?"

She gives me a big smile.  "Ah, so you met him already?"

"Briefly this morning on my jog."

"Well, he is really into you."

"Into me?" I question.  I can't imagine why!  Despite having olive-toned skin, I'm very pale.  I could possibly be passed off as a zombie or a child of the night.  If not for the foundation I wear, people would surely see the bags under my eyes and assume I have a craving for brains.

I wonder what the universe is trying to tell me.  First I meet Xander early this morning, and then at school I become friends with his sister?  I feel like I've suddenly entered into a labyrinth.  But like every labyrinth in life I've ever been through, surely I can get myself out of this one!

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