The List: Nine

To catch up:

THE LIST: CHAPTER INDEX


Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8



Smile (Barb)
Use a Prince Lyric (Irene)
Mention your favorite board game (Jessica)

The Butterfly Effect (Pic Submitted by Linda?)

Chapter Nine:

**********

It is said that a butterfly can cause some kind of ripples in the time space continuum.  Some say if a butterfly relocates from a warm climate to a cold one, it can cause a change in the weather.  I guess the same rules go for crows.  It's said they can see between realms of the living and the dead.  I guess someday we'll know the truth.  All I know is I feel like there was a butterfly effect happening to me.

One minute it was the first day of my senior year, and the next it's the middle of September.  School starts around mid-August in Florida.  I can't believe I made it a month.  This is homecoming week.  I just finished up a pep rally, and Ame came home with me after the game.

I had told her she didn't have to go home with me, as it is her thing to go out and have fun celebrating, but she insisted.  So, we are here playing my favorite game of Boggle.

"Oh, time's up!" She exclaims.  "Let's add up our scores."

I added mine up and got thirteen; Ame got twelve.

She looks over at my sheet and asks, "How come you got more points than me when we have the same amount of words?"

"Because 'bases' is five letters and two points," I answer.

"Well, aren't you smart."

I give a half smile.  "Not really," I say.

"You don't give yourself enough credit. Hey," I look up at her to find her looking at me with concern.  "Are you alright?"

"Yes," I yawn.  "It's just been a long day.  Like I said earlier, you didn't have to come home with me."

"Nonsense," she replies.  "I want to be here.  You're my cousin, and I want us to be close again like we once were."

"I thought this past month has brought us together."

It has definitely been an interesting first month of school.  Cristi has been hanging out more with me.  She's even showed up at my cheer rehearsals, which in the beginning, she was not around for any of that.  She's also insisted we hang out over at my place as opposed to hers, and that was fine by me.

I wasn't avoiding Xander this past month; it was more like he had been avoiding me, but I have no idea why.  In any case, it works out in my favor because I just need to make it through the year, and accomplish everything on my list.  I have plans to backpack through a majority of Europe during winter break.  I even got the plane tickets and my passport ready.  I'll have to get my shots when I get closer to leaving.

This list I make may not be important to anyone else, but it is important to me.  I know Ame and Nora's hearts are in the right place, but I don't want to have a boyfriend.  I might wind up breaking their heart, and I would feel horrible if I did.  The only one that seems to understand me is Cristi

In the beginning, Cristi was interested in hooking me up with her brother, but she understands that I'm not looking for a relationship right now.  Perhaps that's why Xander is staying away.

"It has," she answers, breaking me from my reverie.  "I just want you to know that I will always be there for you.  I'm sorry how I behaved a few months back.  I just didn't know how to handle things."

"It's alright," I smile at her.  "You had a lot going on, and I'm sure hearing my news of going back to school after not being around for a few years."

"I wasn't upset that you were going back to school," she pauses.  "There have been rumors."

"Rumors?"

She eyes the door of my bedroom, gets up off the floor, and shuts the door.  I look at her with surprise.

"There are rumors," she begins in a very low voice.  "That there have been students missing.  They've even been finding dead animals around."

"How true do you think this is?"

"Very.  The staff wants to keep it low key.  They don't want the media getting a hold of this.  Some parents are pretty mad.  They are so mad they want to sue."

"How many students have gone missing?"

"The count is at fifteen.  They're hoping these kids were just playing pranks on their parents and they'll be home in no time."

I am in a state of shock.  I had no idea, and I probably will have a hard time getting to sleep tonight.  At least I'll have time to sleep as the dance isn't until tomorrow night.  The theme is a masquerade ball.  We'll all be dressed up, wearing masks.

"That was the only reason why I didn't want you to attend school."

"So what?" I give a nervous laugh.  "Did you think something would happen to me?  Did you think I would be one of those kids who suddenly disappear?"

She intakes a breath and lets it out.  "You're right," she finally says.  "I was worried for nothing."

"You're always worried about me.  Let's be cousins and friends, not mother and daughter."

She sighs.  "I guess I never realized I was hovering over you like a parent."

"It's alright," I find myself say  "I probably would have behaved in the same manner."

That was pretty much the extent of our conversation before I brushed my teeth, and headed off to bed.  Ame left after I suggested for her to go out and have fun.  The day is pretty much done for me as I close my eyes and go to sleep.

****

*******

I'm at the masquerade ball where I'm wearing a royal purple dress, and a light purple mask.  I am surrounded by all these guys in tuxedos and masks, and they all seem to be staring at me.  One of the guys walks over to me, grabs my hand, and we're dancing a waltz.

"Did you get my letters," he asks me.

"Yes," I reply.  "But why?  Who are you?"

He says nothing as we continue to dance.  After a few moments, he decides to speak.  "I'm not a human, I am a dove.  I'm your conscious, I am love."

The words he speaks sounds familiar, I just can't put my finger on them.

In an instant, I open my eyes and find myself in my room.

It was all a dream, I think to myself.

I look at the clock to see it's two in the morning.

♪♫♪♫ I will die 4 U ♪♫♪♫

"What the?"  I say out loud.  I turn on my night lamp, and look around for my MP3 player.  The Prince song, I Would Die 4 U is playing.  I pull the earbuds out of my ears.  I don't even remember putting that song on my playlist.

5/22/16 ©Diana Jillian
*******
:)

******

The List: Eight

Stepping Stones
Quote Batman
"You ever dance with the devil in the pale moonlight?"
Batman 1989
Mention the word "Exercise"

Picture...

To Catch Up:

THE LIST: CHAPTER INDEX

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7



Eight

 I always make sure to get up extra early because after an exercise, you tend to get sweaty.  And when you get sweaty, you need a shower.  Which is what I have decided to do after I threw the letter in the trash bin.  I decide to focus on my breathing, and I hop in the shower.

After getting out, I wipe down the mirror so I can see my face, but something catches my eye. I look at the back of my shoulder; the part where I thought someone tapped in the park, and see a bruise on there.  Though this bruise looks like someone threw a pebble at me.  Maybe a rock of some sort did fly up at me.  There are city trucks that usually fly by, and their tires frequently throw a rock up in the air at some point.  But it's over and done with, and I'm onto getting ready for my second day of school.

I decide to wear a long, tulle skirt in beige.  I put on some blue leggings, and a shirt to match those leggings.  I throw on some ballerina flats, and head over to the mirror to fix my hair and makeup.  I'm looking a bit pallid today.  The bags are really dark under my eyes today.  I don't really want to scare the people at school, so it's a good idea to try and look my best.

I walk out into the dining room to have some breakfast, and Ame is just staring at me.

"What?"  I ask her.

"Why are you dressed like a little old lady?"

I scoff.  "I'm not dressed like an old lady."

"Maybe not your clothes," she states while looking me up and down.  "But you do need to do something about your hair."

I touch the bun on my head.  "What's wrong with my hairstyle?"  There really isn't much I can do with my short hair.  I was actually surprised--and happy--I was able to fit my hair into a bun.  That means my hair is growing longer.

She says nothing but, "Let me fix it, please?"

I roll my eyes.  "After breakfast."

"Well, I finished mine," she practically brags.  "I'll get all the supplies ready.  I will see you in your room, yeah?"

For the Floridians we are, I don't know how we sometimes sound so northern when we speak. Perhaps it's because Florida gets a lot of snowbirds down here.  I don't say anything to her.  I nod my head yes as she heads for my room.  I go to sit down, where Nora serves me breakfast.  I told her not to serve me, but she always insists.  I stopped arguing with her after awhile.

"There is something not right with that child," Nora says lowly to me after Ame walks away.

"Oh, Nora," I say.  "She just doesn't know how to react with me.  I'm hoping eventually, she'll start treating me like a regular, ordinary person, and not someone who needs to be fixed."

"I suppose you're right," she tells me.  "I know she is family and all, but you need to still stay wary of her.  Well, mostly her family."

"It's alright," I say.  "I chose to go back to school.  I have to remain civil with others, even if they don't always agree with my decisions.  That's life.  Not everyone is going to agree with you."

She gives me a hug.  "When did you become so grown up?"

I hug her back.  "Since I have a great mother figure," I reply.

She lets go of me so I can eat.  After I finish eating, I sigh, and head into the bedroom for Ame to style my hair the way she sees fit.

****

Ame threw my hair halfway back with a hair clip.  She thought it looked better than the bun I had in my hair.  It doesn't matter anymore.  Cristi found me, and is practically dragging me to her group.  It just so happens to be the same group her brother, Xander, is in.  She starts introducing me to people I probably won't remember their names anyway.

"And this is Chase," Cristi finishes her introductions.

Chase looks at me as if to say, "Hello," or something, but he doesn't bother to say anything.  I wonder if I did something wrong.  Sometimes in life, there will be people who won't like you.  Not really for any reason in particular; they just don't like you.  I'll try to do my best to keep away from him.

"Hey I got to bounce," Chase says, and just like that, he's gone.  After hearing him speak, it makes sense why he said nothing.  That was the voice I heard making a reference to me being the new wine yesterday.

"Hey," Cristi says to me.  I stop staring at Chase--who has practically run away--and I look over at her.  "Sorry about yesterday after school."

"It's cool," I tell her.  "I kind of figured you weren't feeling so good yesterday at lunch."

"You noticed that, huh?"  She looks up at her brother.  I look at the two of them exchanging glances with each other.  It doesn't take a genius to figure out what's going on, but that's none of my business.  I have to focus on being as young at heart for as long as possible, and I also have to focus on my list.

The first bell rings, and I tell the group I will see them later on.  I head to class, and everything seems pretty much normal for the rest of the day.

******

Cheerleading practice went well.  Ame and the rest of the cheerleaders seem really impressed with me.  They think I'm ready for the pep rally at the hockey game Friday night.  That's only three days away.  I can only hope I can be ready for it.  Then I can cross off being an official cheerleader from my list.

I give myself a mental shake as I head to my locker.  I have to grab a few books to study for as there will be a quiz on Thursday.  They do quizzes on Thursdays as opposed to Fridays because I guess Fridays are exciting days for seniors.  I guess I'll find out in a few days time.

I go to open my locker and something falls out onto the floor.  I bend down to pick it up.  There is a red rose with a note attached to it.  I look around to see the halls are empty.  Ame went home straight from the gym, and Cristi--as far as I know--left as soon as school let out.

I open the letter and it reads:

You ever dance with the devil in the pale moonlight?

Great!  I think to myself.  He's quoting Batman.  I roll my eyes--much like I had done this morning--but now I am starting to recall something.  The handwriting looks exactly like the note I received this morning.  I guess I'll have to take the note out of the trash to see if it's from the same person.

I head to the car to find Smith waiting for me.  For once in my life, I am actually glad my parents got me a bodyguard.

****

http://thethinkywriter.blogspot.com/2016/05/the-list-eight.html

The List: Seven

To catch up:

The List Chapter Index

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6

The List: Seven


Some say silence is golden, but I prefer to have my headphones in my ears. Some days, I listen to a radio app while jogging, other days I'll just have my own playlist or album to listen to.  Today is a Disturbed kind of mood.  It's also a great escape from life for awhile.  I once heard a great quote that said something along the lines of escapism is survival.  That is a very true term for me.

I use jogging and listening to music as means to escape from every day life.  I also escape through books and writing.  I guess pretty much anything you do to keep yourself busy are means of escaping from every day realities.  Who doesn't want to escape anyway?

I know my time by my songs, mostly.  I know by the end of track 4--that's the end of the song called The Sickness--I will have to head back home and get ready for school.  I'll be ready for day two today, or at least I hope so.

I don't mind going to school with Ame, and I don't mind hanging out with Cristi; I just don't want to wind up seeing Xander, although the tap I just received on my shoulder tells me the opposite.  I stop abruptly and look over my shoulder, but don't I see anyone.

I slow down and come to a complete halt when I notice there's no one in the park but me--and Smith, my bodyguard, of course--I take my headphones out of my ears and look around.  Smith is giving me a strange look.

"Did you just tap me on my shoulder?"

"Um, no ma'am," he replies in his thick, southern accent.  Smith, too, is from the real south as well.  By real south--because I know you're thinking Florida is real south--I mean where the southern accents come from.  Smith just so happens to also be from Louisiana, like Nora.

I shrug.  It could have been my imagination just running wild like usual.  I decide to turn around and head home.  It's just about time to get ready for school anyway.  I put back on my headphones to find Good Morning Heartache by Billie Holiday playing.  While it is one of my favorite songs, I don't remember switching my playlist at all.

I give yet another shrug, and head home.  As I arrive at the house, Nora and Ame are waiting for me.  I start stretching as I look at my smart watch.  I start pressing buttons on it so I can check my pulse.  After my stretches, I head to my room where I jot down my vitals.

I write everything down the old-fashioned way.  I write them in notebooks.  I keep a health journal in my desk drawer.  I finish marking everything down and I head to the shower.  It's time to get ready for another day of school.


After my shower, I head back into my bedroom to get dressed.  Something catches the corner of my eye by my backpack as I am sitting on the bed.  There seems to be a folded piece of paper just laying on top of the stand.  I head over and pick it up.

As I unfold the letter, I am surprised by what I am seeing.  The letter reads:

Dear Kalura,

You like lists, and now here's mine:

1.  To win your heart

Signed,

I look inside my bag to see if there's another note around.  Whoever wrote me this letter, they never left a name.  I sigh at the lack of control I have over some things in my life.  That's one of the reasons why I have to see a psychiatrist to begin with.

One of the things we deal with is learning how to meditate and let go.  That is what I decide to do.  I set my timer for a minute, and I focus on how I'm breathing.  Inhale.  Exhale.  Slow, controlled breathing.  The timer dings, and I open my eyes.  I see the letter, and I give a little laugh. 

I roll my eyes, and toss the paper in the trash.  It's probably just someone trying to prank the new girl or something.  I head out the room where Nora, Ame, and Smith are waiting for me at the breakfast table.  Today should definitely be more interesting than yesterday.



*******

http://thethinkywriter.blogspot.com/2016/05/the-list-seven.html

The List: Six

To catch up:

THE LIST: CHAPTER INDEX

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5

Chapter Six:  The Sleepover

Nora seemed a bit taken aback when I brought Ame home earlier.  I was not expecting that from her.  Of course, she didn't show these emotions on the surface; I just felt that emitting from her.  I can be a sentient person sometimes.

Nora tells me all the time I should always embrace my sentient side.  So many have innate abilities, and tend to ignore them when they conform to society's standards--or so that's what she's always told me before.  I think the reason Nora was shocked to see Ame at all was because we--Ame and I--haven't been exactly on speaking terms for a few months.  I figure I can explain my day to Nora sometime tomorrow when we're alone or something.

I don't want to make my cousin feel bad.  She does mean well in her own way.  I just wanted to stop seeing things her way, and do things my way for once.  Sometimes, in order for people to change and grow, they need to separate themselves from others until they find out just what they want out of life; that was what I had done.

I know Ame feels hurt by what I've done, but I also know how forgiving she can be.  I know eventually, she'll come around and--hopefully--understand where I'm coming from.  I bring my thoughts back to the present, and spit out the toothpaste that washed my mouth.  I rinse the toothbrush off and hang it up.

I told Ame I needed a moment after we watched Cast Away for the millionth time.  I don't know why we're watching this movie.  I'd rather be watching some kind of a rom-com right about now.  I've been in a fragile state of mind lately, but I don't want to ruin the fun Ame and I are having.

We've watched Cast Away so much, we start creating our own dialog on what the characters are saying.  It was pretty funny, but I just needed a moment to myself, and so I excused myself to get ready for bed.  There still is school in the morning, so we can't stay up too much longer.

I walk out of the bathroom, and hear my cousin saying something.

"And even in death
"I will stay on the right path
"The best I could be"

I recognize what she's saying.  That's a haiku I wrote in my journal.  I open the door to find her with my journal in her hands.  She looks up at me, pretends nothing is wrong about this situation at all, and smiles.

"I didn't know you kept a secret diary," she says.

I don't know what to say to her.  The last time, she found out I was making a list of things I'd like to accomplish in my life--which, when she found out, she freaked out--and that was one of the reasons why we hadn't talked in a long time.

"Uh, sorry," she continues to speak.  "I stumbled upon it under the pillow.  Something felt uncomfortable when I laid my head down."

I still say nothing.  I am surprised she hasn't tried to argue with me like the last time.  I look down to the ground.  I just want to enjoy my senior year; I don't want any trouble.

"Again, I'm sorry," I look back at her.  "I shouldn't have read your secret diary without your permission.  Though I must tell you," she pauses, closes the book, and hands it to me.  "You're a fantastic writer.  I didn't know you could write haiku's and poetry like that."

I give a curt laugh.  "Neither did I," I find myself say.  I look back at her.  "For the record it's a journal, and if it was so secretive, I would have found a better hiding place for it.  I keep it under the pillow to write down my weird dreams."

"Oh," she responds as if a light bulb just went on in her head or something.  "That explains those cryptic entries."

"Yeah," I give a little smile as I head over to my bed to put my journal back under the pillow.

"Why do you write down your dreams?"

"My shrink told me to," I begin.  "She told me to write them down, because it's a way of the subconscious telling you something."

"Is that why you made that list?"

"No," I yawn as I crawl into bed.  "You know why."  I lay down and turn off the lamp light.

I hear her sigh as she crawls into the other side of my king-sized bed.  "I know."

She starts mumbling something, but I'm not really listening as my dreams have now taken full effect.  I'm sure whatever it is, we can chat more in the morning after my jog.

*******

The List: Five

To catch up:

THE LIST: CHAPTER INDEX

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4

The List:  Chapter 5

I look up at the ceiling of the gym room, and see the spider web that has grabbed my attention.  I wonder how long the spider has to wait until food becomes entrapped by the web.  I can't believe I survived a whole day of school--well, almost.

I met Cristi at lunch, just as she said she would meet me, but something was different about her when I saw her in the cafeteria.  She looked hungry, even though she was barely picking at her meal during lunchtime.  When the bell rang, I could tell she looked a bit happy.  It was almost as if it was her first time in the cafeteria from my own observation.  But still, when the bell rang, she looked happy and asked once again if she could join me for tryouts.

And again, I told her she could, but tryouts started five minutes ago.  I'm guessing whatever was ailing Cristi, is probably ailing her now.  Sometimes a viral bug takes days to go away--I mean--if she has a viral bug.

"Okay," I turn my head to look at the girl speaking.  I suddenly remember I'm at the gym, trying out for the impossible, but it is on my list.  "Next up, Kallie."

I take a deep breath and try to remember the routine I've been working on all summer.  It was a very long summer.  I wonder how the spider does it while resting comfortably in their web.  They don't think; they simply act on instinct.  I am ready to do this.

I step out away from the crowd of girls, and stand in front of the three cheerleaders that are conducting the tryouts.

"Hey everyone," Ame, the head cheerleader speaks.  "Can we take five?"  She looks at me and pulls me to the side.

"Kalura," she says to me.  "What are you doing here?"

"Well, Amethyst," I answer.  "I wanted to try out for cheerleading."

"Are you sure this is wise?"

"I think I know what I'm doing."

"Had I known Kallie was short for Kalura, I would have stopped you."

"Please don't do this, Ame," I beg.

Amethyst happens to be my cousin.  Everyone around here calls her Ame for short.  With a name like hers and a name like mine, it's not hard to tell we're related, but that's about it.

Amethyst got her name because when she was born, her eyes were of an amethyst color.  Usually babies have blue eyes that eventually turn color, but not Ame.  Her eyes have been this blue amethyst color since birth.

Her hair is pin straight, and hangs down to her waistline, and the color of her hair is such a dark brown, it's almost black.  If it weren't for her eye color, you could swear she was of Korean descent.  I would love to have her eyes.  My eyes are a very light blue, almost translucent if it weren't for the dark blue rings that outlines the irises of my eyes.  I look at my cousin, still pleading.

"Why do you want to do this?"  She asks me.

"Because," I begin to say.  I decide to not say anymore.

"Not because of that stupid list," she exclaims.  "Tell me it's not because of that list!"

Amethyst, though we are the same age, feels she needs to be protective of me.  We have kind of grown up together like sisters, but things changed between us when I started being homeschooled.  It was like we both wanted different things out of life; I wanted to live my life, while she wanted to shelter me from it.

We stopped hanging out in public, and she would only show up to my house alone.  I stopped hanging around her friends as well.  It's been so long, I don't think any of them would recognize me anyway.  What ever they knew of me then, they don't know me now.  I don't even believe anyone knows we're related, even if we do share the same last name.  Her father is my dad's older brother.  Perhaps that's why she feels protective over me.  I'll never truly know the answer to that, I suppose.

"And what if it is because of the list?" I find myself rhetorically asking.  "It's not like I'll cause any kind of damage to you.  I can always be a fill in just in case someone can't make it to a meet."

I can tell by her face that she wants to tell me no.  I'll have to soften it up a bit.

"Please, Ame.  Please," I beg.  "Can't you just humor me for once and let me fulfill what's on my list."

I can tell she's contemplating.  She suddenly has a playful look in her face.  "Can I see your list?"

"Only if you promise not to judge," I begin.  "Perhaps I can show you after school.  You can come home with me."

She smiles.  "Alright," she finally agrees.  "I'll let my parents know and," she takes a pause and inhales.  "Oh, maybe we can have a sleepover."

"I'm sure Nora won't mind," I say.

"Oh is Uncle Kaleb and Aunt Laura not home?"

"Nope.  It's just Nora and I."  And Smith, the bodyguard my parents hired because they feel bad for not being around for almost a year now.  I keep the last statements to myself.

"So, have you met anyone today?"

"A nice girl," I reply.  "She was supposed to meet me for tryouts, but she was looking sick earlier in the cafeteria.  Her name is Cristi."

"Cristi Turner?"  She asks.  "Her twin brother is Xander Turner.  He's the goaltender of the hockey team here."

It seems as though this Xander guy is everywhere.  Maybe I shouldn't bother with tryouts.

"Well, let's see what you got," Ame says to me.  I guess I have to go through with it as I have just practically begged her to let me try out.  "Hey guys," she calls out to her teammates.  "Break time is over!  Let's see what Kallie can do."

I can hear them cheering in back of me.  I feel a little nervous, but I inhale, and give Ame the song on my MP3 player I want to play.  She plays the track, and I'm ready to do my cheer.

The song ends as my routine is done.  Ame pauses the MP3 player, and everyone is silent.  Well, I think to myself.  At least I tried my best.

"Oh my gosh!"  One of the girls in back of me says as she walks up to me.  "You're like a natural!  Where have you been hiding?"  I look around an all the girls agree.

"She's been gone for awhile," Ame says before I can say anything about homeschooling.  "I didn't want to say anything because I wanted her to get on the team by her own merit.  You guys!  This is my cousin, Kalura!"

They were all excited and asking me all kinds of questions.  I didn't even know where to begin on answering.  Everything started to feel jumbled.

"Congratulations," Ame speaks over everyone.  They all silence down to listen to what she has to say.  "Kallie," she looks at me.  "Welcome to the team!"

We practice some routines for about an hour, and then we all head home.

Amethyst goes to get in the car, but panics a bit when she sees Smith, my bodyguard.

"Oh no!" I roll my eyes and walk over to him.  "I thought we agreed you were to hide in plain site."

"I'm sorry Miss Kalura," Smith begins.  "But I have orders."

"Well, this is my cousin, Ame, and she's coming home with me."  Smith opens the door and I enter the car.  "Come on, Ame.  I'll explain to you everything."

On the ride home, Amethyst listens to every word I say.  She listens to me tell her how my parents have been gone--like always--still trying to save the world of cancer, and how I inherited a bodyguard.

A night with my cousin and Nora should be interesting.



DJ

NEXT:

Chapter 6
******